Summer time, when the living is (sort of) easy

Next week my kids will finish school and summer will officially begin at Chez V-Grrrl.

This fills me with equal parts anxiety and excitement.

It will be a relief to stop the merry-go-round of school, sports, and scouts, and have far fewer commitments on the calendar. I will love rolling over in bed in the morning and catching a few more ZZZZs. For my kids, it will mean freedom to explore some of their personal passions. They never lack for things to do. Creative types, they’re always planning and executing some type of project of their own design.

But (and there’s always a “but”), having more than one creative type under the roof 24/7 can get a little crazy. Once they conceive of an idea of something to do/make, there’s NO REST until it is completed. If I’m “paged” to help provide materials or expertise with one of their projects, I better be willing to drop everything. If not, their incessant interruptions and requests will ping on my brain all day long and whatever it is I hoped to accomplish that day will be lost in the fray.

The other side of the equation, where they act independently and don't consult me, is a problem in an entirely different way. If they’re quiet and fully engaged with some creative pursuit elsewhere in the house, the temptation for me is to become fully engaged in a creative activity of my own (like blogging!). However, if I don’t occasionally trudge up or down the stairs and check what’s going on in the attic craft room, the basement workshop, or their bedrooms, I regret it:

“This is no place to play with splatter paint! Look at the walls!”

“No, you may not make crystals without supervision. Those are strong chemicals! You didn’t get that on your hands did you? Where are your goggles?”

“You’re making bread without a recipe? Is that why there’s flour EVERYWHERE?”

“Who spilled nail polish on the floor? Hurry up! Get a paper towel!”

“Where are my scissors? And why is the kitchen knife in the backyard?”

You get the idea.

I know what you’re thinking: why don’t I just park them in front of the TV or computer and enjoy life? Why don’t I send them to camp for six weeks? Why don’t these kids have Gameboys and Play Stations to keep their hands busy and their butts in one place? Good questions

It’s because in theory I thoroughly enjoy how innovative, motivated, and imaginative my kids are. I say in theory because in reality, letting kids build forts, do carpentry projects, run clubs, make jewelry, sculpt stuff, cook meals, design hamster mazes, take apart electronics, and catch critters is as messy and exhausting for me as it is exhilarating and exciting for them.

So to survive summer, I either need to get cable or a satellite dish and ruin their minds with nonstop cartoons and children’s programming, or I need to channel their energy and insist on some structure in our days.

Seeing as my kids are anal retentive like their dad, an engineer, I’m going to try and come up with a weekly schedule that gives us all time to pursue our interests without making each other nuts. I'm not a Martha or a "Family Fun" magazine kind of grrrl, so it's got to be simple if I'm going to stick with it.

Admit it, in theory, having a schedule is a great idea. So stop laughing and wish me luck. It might work. 

Stay tuned.

© 2006 Veronica McCabe Deschambault. All rights reserved.

June 9, 2006

Comments

[Char]

V:
Today is the last day of school here. I, too, have mixed feelings. The schedule thing does work, you just have to be persistent. The number one summer lifesaver for me is "Quiet Time". Every afternoon after lunch, all three kids must go to their rooms and park it on their beds. They may read, do word games, sleep, or play with toys, as long as they are on their bed. No exceptions. I set the timer for one hour. If I'm lucky, one of them will nap.

Here's to 10 weeks of fun!

[Shirley]

Flylady has some great ideas for summer structure--activities that are helpful AND fun. There have been testimonials raving about her Camp idea. You adapt to your own interests. One testimonial talked about how one family used a Harry Potter theme. Another talked about how they took one meal put it through the food processor and the kids ate it a la Fear Factor and got a reward. Here's the link to the basic premise. Check it out. Good luck to you all whatever approach you take! (My son is 18 and heading off to college in two months so my summer won't be quite in the camp mentality. LOL)

http://www.flylady.net/pages/camp_kickoff.asp

[Arabella]

I think a schedule is a great idea. You're a good mom, supporting your kids with their creative endeavors. They will always have fond memories of your allowing them to do these things, and they will grow into smart, happy, motivated, problem-solving adults.

Is there a certain room they can confine their activities to? Maybe one that is fully washable? Is it possible for you to set up shop in that room, too, and do your blogging while in the room with them, and while you all enjoy each others' company and conversation? Are these the idiotic ramblings of a non-mom who has no idea what she's talking about?

[V-Grrrl]

We actually have a space on the third floor that is all set up for crafts. They have a paper chest with all their different kinds of paper neatly sorted into drawers, they have a cabinet with each labeled shelf dedicated to a specific item, they have plastic boxes labeled for stamps, stickers, markers, crayons, colored pencils etc. They have a box with close to ten pairs of scissors of varying types in it. Ditto glue, tapes, etc. Two desks, his and hers, and lots of room on the floor to spread out.

Is this sunny, well-equipped lovely spot the place they do crafts? Sometimes. But more often they haul stuff downstairs and spread it out somewhere it doesn't belong.

I will share with you this Golden Nugget of Living with Children: all their stuff, all their gear, all their toys, EVERYTHING ends up in your kitchen. This is why clearing off the table (and the floor) so you can eat takes longer than meal preparation. : )

[Shirley]

V-grrrl--everyone loves to be in the main areas of the house where others are and there is loving hubbub, so to speak. (Did you always do your homework at the kitchen table? I know I did until I reached teenagehood.) The craft room sounds great, but I know I have a lovely sewing/craft room and if my project does not require the sewing machine, I drag it to the living room because I don't like to be off by myself away from the happenings. I am sure you'll lay down some rules that will help things go more smoothly, like only working on one project at a time, cleaning up for 15 minutes before dinner, etc. You are a great mom and from all these things, great minds will flourish, and you will always look back on these times with a smile on your face. Still, I understand the slight fear of what the summer might bring, having read your previous blogs on animals out of control, etc. LOL

[Shirl Grrrl]

Shirley,
You need to go back into the archives and find the entries on kids and food items showing up in unusual places throughout Chez V! Then you may better understand V-Grrrl's slight fear!

[V-Grrrl]

Back in the States, I actually kept all their craft stuff in a cabinet in the kitchen so they could work at the kitchen table and I could make sure they didn't get out of hand with the glue, paint, etc. I don't have room to do that here

And yeah, Shirl Grrrl is right. Long before I started a blog, she listened to my frazzled ramblings about life at home with my "domestic terrorists." It wasn't pretty! Granola Grrl and I have swapped war stories on my blog. Her three boys are also very, "creative" and um, "spirited." ("Spirited" being the euphemism we use to refer to our children being POSSESSED!) Ahem.

[TB]

I think you are a wonderful mother and one day, when they are older your children are going to thank you for fostering their imaginations. That is all.

[Shirley]

Ah, "spirited" ... love that!! Yeah, mine has always been creatve and spirited too. Please understand I wasn't dismissing V-Grrrl's concerns regarding Chez V at all, just trying to focus on the positives ... hope the domestic terrorists treat you better this summer, V-Grrrl--I mean it! Those stories will make great book material ... remember the stories of Fudge by Beverly Cleary (if I recall correctly)? They probably don't even compare to your stories!

[Michael]

I teach middle school. It's time for you moms to have them back!

[RD]

Oh, how true. No matter how lovely a craft room/play room we have for them, everything ends up in the kitchen and family room. Our summer vacation is underway too and I've been saved by the fact they've already been to grandma's house and one is off to camp. Life will be further complicated this summer by the fact our house is on the market and must be ready at all times for a showing scheduled on short notice. It's a major hassle and cramps the creative geniuses that live here. Ugh...

[mamatulip]

Ah, schedules -- the only way my world revolves is on a schedule (most days, at least). Good luck -- I think it's a great idea.

And I have to laugh -- when it gets too quiet here, I know something's going on. Something that has the potential to be not so good.

[Mega Mom]

I think your summer and your family sound absolutely delightful. Enjoy it all, schedule or not, I'm sure you'll have fun and make memories!

[Flubberwinkle]

I was going to comment on how much I admire the fact that you won't plop your children in front of a television set and let them veg out with any old cartoon and how proud you must be of your children's creativeness / restlessness and then I read Michael's comment and can't stop laughing...