Expatriate Blues
October 19, 2005 at 5:16 Culture shock takes many forms but no where does it hit harder than in the house we’re living in while abroad.
This should be the place where I retreat from the foreignness of the world outside and revel in all that is comfortable and familiar to me. Step into my house in Belgium and you’d wonder why I don’t love it. It’s bigger than the one we have at home and rich in architectural detail with heavy doors, iron hinges and door latches, exposed brick walls and ceiling beams, knotty pine paneling, abundant windows, a curving staircase, the red tile roof, and ceramic tile floors. It oozes cozy European country charm. But there's more than meets the eye. Consider:
This is a five-bedroom house with exactly ONE closet—in the foyer. One of the attic bedrooms has become a walk-in closet crammed with boxes of clothes, shoes, toys, toiletries, linens, and office supplies. This is actually OK because it's not really suitable to serve as a bedroom since it is tucked under steep eaves, lit by a single 40 watt bulb, and has only one outlet plug-in, which brings me to…
The kitchen--which has just three outlet plugs. Only indispensable appliances like the toaster, coffee maker, electric kettle, microwave, and lamp are worthy of getting plugged in, and still we play musical outlets. Something is always left out. The crock pot, countertop grill, and mixer are commiserating because they’ve lost priority and been relegated to the basement. They shouldn’t feel bad, because even though the vacuum cleaner is occupying prime real estate in the house’s only closet, it still doesn’t get plugged in often because…
It sometimes throws a circuit breaker—probably because we’re American energy gluttons who have dared to upgrade to 60 watt bulbs in the ceiling fixtures, which we rationalize is OK since we’re conserving water (against our will, of course). You see, in this big house valued at about $550,000 we have….
One shower and never enough hot water, despite paying about $400 a month in utilities. Every night I face the same dilemma--wash my hair OR shave my legs—I can’t do both. And besides not having hot water….
The bathroom doesn’t have a fan, a heater, or a vanity, so it’s cold, cluttered, AND prone to mildew and …
While there are two tubs located elsewhere in the house, we can’t use either one because sediment accumulates in the pipes and they’re so clogged with mineral deposits from the unbelievably hard water here that if you dare to fill a tub, the water will be both rust- colored and tepid. Don’t count on retreating from the bathroom to the kitchen for comfort because…
You’ll undoubtedly be in the way of any other family member lingering there. Seduced by its big window and charming tile backsplash, I didn’t notice its retarded layout . One of the lower cabinets open into the side of the dishwasher and the upper cabinets are hung so high that even though I’m 5 foot 7 inches, I struggle to reach the contents. And so I have to keep a step stool on hand, which is always in the way, along with the piles of recyclables which that are the result of having to sort our trash into SEVEN different categories, which can only legally be disposed of in government-mandated color-coded bags which cost more than a $1 each. And as long as we're talking about environmentalism, let's discuss….
My energy-efficient European fridge and oven which have less than two-thirds of the capacity I’m accustomed to. They will never accommodate a Thanksgiving turkey or even enough food and beverage to host a proper party, which means I may have to wait indefinitely to celebrate….
How thankful we are to be living in this beautiful house in Belgium, even though we miss the abundant outlets, lighting, storage, hot water, and cheap utilities at home. : )
© 2005 Veronica McCabe Deschambault. All rights reserved.
October 19, 2005
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