Confessions

This is all Neil's fault. His "Bloggers with Biceps" campaign has driven me to admit that instead of deporting my expat fat, I've once again extended its visa by 30 days.

Yesterday I volunteered at Field Day and had lunch with a bunch of nice, friendly school moms.They all ordered garden salads for lunch. I ordered a cheeseburger smothered with onions and  some fries. I tried to convince myself I should be proud of my refusal to succumb to group peer pressure and savor my American independence, but secretly I was ashamed of breaking ranks with the healthy salad-eaters. I know better.  

The truth is, I have been living on the DARK side--chocolat noir has me under its evil spell.  I have been walking 45 minutes to an hour, four to five days a week, but all routes lead back to the kitchen. Unless I walk AWAY from the Cote D'Or truffe noir and lift something heavier than a box of Godiva, all my exercise is in vain.  I have got to pull myself together!

You know the stereotype of the vulnerable middle age woman--lonely, bored, and easily seduced? It's (gulp) all true.  Last week all the flirting in the grocery store led to a one night stand--with a bag of Doritos. I woke up in the morning with puffy eyes and a bad taste in my mouth. Where's my self respect? My moral backbone? My waist?

Hopefully not lost forever.  I'll go searching for it, I promise--after the bagel orgy.

Copyright 2006 Veronica McCabe Deschambault. All rights reserved.

June 13, 2006

Comments

[Neil]

The Doritos are crap. But new research says chocolate has a lot of antioxidants. So, you can tell yourself that you're eating chocolate for your health -- and drink it down with some cancer-fighting red wine!

[Plain Jane]

Love your blog! Makes me feel real.

[Debbie]

Hang in there!! We all have our days like this. Wish we didn't, but we do.

Actually, the cheeseburger sounded really good. And the chocolate. If I lived where you do that's all I would eat is chocolate.

[V-Grrrl]

Thanks Jane! I figure it's better to let my failings hang out than my Botticelli belly. At least I know how to dress. : )

[RD]

Maybe it's an "American Woman in Belgium" thing. Three years later I'm still fighting to get off the bread and chocolate belly I put on in Brussels. If it makes you feel better, those of us who've been in your shoes know how impossible it is to fight against chocolate noir and pain au chocolat. Just give in to the pleasure for now.

[TB]

Mexican food has been my downfall lately. Good luck getting back on track!!

[Flubberwinkle]

You shouldn't tease your blog friends like this... when you know doctors told me NOT to have chocolate... I'm still having withdrawal symptoms, sorry for my snapping. I'm reaching for a tasteless cracker to ease my need.

;-)

[V-Grrrl]

Sex is the only substitute for chocolate (and it burns calories!). Crackers are never gonna make you sigh with contentment. Go for the Good Love Flubberwinkle!