Male Insensitivity: It's Genetically Ingrained

by Mike on the Bottom

 My wife Lisa's 41st birthday is Saturday.

 She related this story today about an exchange with our 2-year-old son Jay and her mother, Ella: 

This morning at breakfast Ella said to Jay "Ask Mommy what kind of birthday cake she wants."

So Lisa whispered in Jay's ear, "Chocolate."

Jay looked across the room at his grandmother and said "A baseball cake."

Lisa whispered, "No Jay, Mommy wants a CHOCOLATE cake."

Jay, straight-faced, looked at his grandmother and said, "Mommy wants a baseball cake for her birthday."

Lisa chuckled and said "No Jay, that's not what Mommy said". At that point, Jay started to smirk.

One last time, Lisa leaned over and whispered in his ear, "Mommy wants a CHOCOLATE cake!"

At this Jay tilted his head back, let out a big belly laugh and yelled "Mommy wants a BASEBALL cake for her birthday!"

Lisa said maybe she'll have to get a chocolate baseball cake....

Mike on the Bottom, aka Michael Zitz Beckham, is a journalist, smart-ass, and semi-pro baseball coach. It appears Jay is a lot like Dad.

Copyright 2006 Michael Zitz Beckham. All rights reserved.

Comments

[Shirl Grrrl]

My husband is a lot like Jay. Here are some gifts I've received over the years from hubs... a new driveway (meaning a new coating of asphalt), spy cameras that were mounted in the bedrooms so that I could keep an eye on the kids by watching them on the TV downstairs, a new TV for the bedroom (I hate having a TV in the bedroom), a new wall mounting thingy for said TV, a bowling ball with the name "John" on it (okay, so that was an episode of The Simpsons, but I could so relate to Marge's plight) and I am sure I'm missing some because we've been married over 14 years. But he has given me so much more than I really deserve over the years so I never really complained about the driveway.

[V-Grrrl]

Hey Shirl Grrrl,

Wow! A new driveway! A TV mounted on the wall in the bedroom! You lucky Grrrl!

I hear rubber stamps and craft supplies make GREAT gifts! Especially when you buy them for yourself. Ha, ha, ha. You wouldn't know a thing about that though. ;)

[wordgirl]

Happy Chocolate Birthday Baseball Cake! I think that should about cover it.

[Denice]

Well, if it has chocolate in it you just cannot go wrong.

[Flubberwinkle]

Maybe Mike's & Lisa's little boy has the right idea. Best of BOTH worlds baked together! Why settle for just the chocolate when you can get a baseball one too?

[Granola-grrrl]

Smart kid, and only two! You must be so proud! He'll be an exciting teen :)

My father-in-law loves to put together scale model cars. So my mother-in-law often receives one or two of the little kits for her birthday. She always *acted* excited and surprised, at least.

In the past, I have received puzzling gifts from my husband, which, for me, underscored the distance I felt between us (the time and distance between us now has thankfully erased a lot of those gifts from my memory). It was so excruciating to watch him flounder, I finally started keeping a running wish list on the fridge (which he copied into his palm pilot when he thought I wasn't looking).

For some reason, now that we're separated, John can find me the perfect gifts. Last year for Christmas, he gave me a djembe (drum), since he knew I wanted to start going to drum circles. This year, he saw the collector's edition DVD of my favorite movie, and knew I had to have it. Ironically, I have a terrible time trying to pick gifts for him now, when it was almost second nature before. I'm sure there's something there that I don't care to analyze too closely this morning ;)

I vote for the chocolate baseball cake. If nothing else, years from now, the pictures will remind you of this awesome story.

[V-Grrrl]

Hey Granola Grrrl,

I remember when John got you a painting of a donkey...and the time you sent him to the store to get hot fudge to pour over ice cream (which you were desperately craving) and he came home with caramel topping--on purpose. Not because he'd forgotten what you wanted but because he thought what you *really* wanted was caramel--which as I recall, you hate.

The E-Man had some splendid gift mishaps early in the marriage. An umbrella as an anniversary gift. The game "Clue" (how ironic! Get a Clue!). He has improved over time and now he almost always hit the mark spectacularly well.Some of his best gifts have been the spontaneous ones he's picked up along the way or on his travels. Cool jewelry, leather bags, scarves, the Uggs (!), writing paper, a leather journal, colognes....He never buys me clothes. Smart guy.