Photographs and Memories
August 3, 2006 at 10:27 My children both have September birthdays and every August in anticipation of their big days, I’d have them professionally photographed. First I’d schedule a session for my son, then for my daughter, and finally a joint session of the two of them together.
The photos would be sent off to friends and family, the latest one prominently displayed, and the others lovingly arranged in the big leather-bound photo album I’d bought just for their portraits.
Before our move to Belgium, I debated what to do with our family photos. As much as I wanted them with me, I was terrified that somehow, somewhere in their crossing of the Atlantic, they’d get lost or ruined.
In the end, I decided to leave them in our house in the States. Our tenant, a colleague of my husband’s, graciously agreed to let us use one of the bedroom closets to store family heirlooms that needed to be in a safe, climate-controlled space.
I wish I’d had time to rummage through my photos for duplicates to bring with us, but in the hair-pulling frenzy that is an international move, there was no time for such luxuries. I packed one 8 x10 and one 5x7 of my kids into my suitcase and slipped a small framed photo of my mother into my purse. I left thousands of photos at home, including the portraits.
I didn’t think it was that big a deal at the time. I reasoned I had E and the kids with me, so why did I need photos too? Live and learn.
Not having photos of my children’s early years eroded my sense of wholeness. I never realized how thumbing through all those albums revived our sense of family and shared history. I needed to see pictures of the babies I’d rocked, the toddlers I’d chased, and the kids I sent off to elementary school to fully appreciate the almost 9 and 11 year olds I live with now.
When August 2005 came and went without professional portraits being done, I felt incomplete. In the U.S. there’s a photo studio in every mall and town, but there are far fewer here. Last summer I was still coping with the upheaval of our move and didn’t have the energy to track down a photographer who could speak English and be reached by public transit.
Instead, I purchased all the half-assed portraits the school photo people took, wondering how anyone calling themselves a photographer could do such crappy work. Yes, I know they can’t control the expression on the kids’ faces or fuss with their hair, but they can make sure the lighting is right and the children positioned correctly relative to the camera. Some of those pics looked like mug shots, some were out of focus, and the outdoor ones were underexposed, lacked contrast, and showed Mr. A and E-Grrrl slouching like trolls.
When an American photographer showed up to photograph E-Grrrl’s softball team, I talked to him to see if I could arrange a private sitting. “Sure,” he said. When I got my softball photos and saw what he was selling I dropped any plans to work with him again. This guy was clearly interested in collecting checks, not creating a cherished photograph.
Happily, I recently found a studio nearby with an English-speaking photographer and booked an appointment for the kids to have portraits done. I didn’t even ask how much it would cost when I booked, and then I called back and learned my “session fee” would be $150. Ouch. Seemed like a lot but I didn’t want to cancel. What I didn’t know at the time was that this fee included a photo package so it wasn’t a bad deal, but the fact that I was willing to put $150 on the line just to have my kids photographed qualifies my desperation.
The photographer did a great job putting the kids at ease. He kept them relaxed and comfortable and got my camera-hating boy to lose the tense expression on his face and made the most of my camera-loving girl’s enthusiasm. He spent 45 minutes with them in the studio. He caught my daughter’s bubbly personality and a glimpse of my son’s sly sense of humor.
With prints in hand, I finally feel normal again. If only I had my leather album to mount their portraits in….
August 3, 2006
Copyright 2006 Veronica McCabe Deschambault. All rights reserved.
Family
Reader Comments (6)
You should have asked me :)... I'm just kick-starting my photography career over here in Belgie and am building a portfolio since I left all my serious work back home in New Zealand.
We could have talked expat fat and dirty dishes ... two certain sure banes of my life.
Glad you found someone anyway.
I can also understand your feelings about not bringing your photos. Everytime we move I pray nothing happens to my photos. In fact, my carry on luggage contains all my negatives. Thank god I've switched to digital which takes up so much less space!
Even though I still have a lot to learn about photography I'd be happy to take photos of your family when I get settled in Belgium. You can check out some of my photos on my blog and if my style is in line with what you like I'd be happy to help you create new cherished memories of your children.