Stuck

...in the kitchen supervising homework for hours after school, reconciling what's been done and what hasn't been done on three weeks worth of school work. We have until Monday to make up  all those missing assignments. Yesterday it took at least two hours to do just that day's assignments.  Anticipating a weekend of homework hell. I hope it rains. I wish I had a Valium--or ten--to get me through. 

My washing machine is leaking, and I don't know who to call to get it replaced (it's a loaner and I can't find the file with the contact info on it because it was delivered in the midst of our move). It's been really hot, and E and the kids are involved in sports so we're generating tons of sweaty laundry. I'm desperate. I keep using the washer and letting it dump big puddles of water on the floor because I can't stop doing laundry or I. Will. Never. Catch. Up.

I wonder about living a life that revolves around bleaching underwear and getting mud stains out of socks .

I've spent so many hours at the school this week dealing with crises of various natures that I've had very little time to deal with domestic duties. And to make matters worse, I've been so exhausted babysitting parenting one child that the other has gotten absolutely nothing from me. Triple the effort, double the guilt.

 E left on a trip today and no sooner did he go out the door that the water softener in the basement started beeping. It's out of some key chemical that can only be purchased by the plumber at a contractor supply store. The alarm won't stop beeping, the instructions on the freakin thing are in German, and I just want to scream. Or take a hammer to it. That would be singularly satisfying. 

As I type this, I have a child sobbing over a missing pet rock named Spicky. I am not making this up. Spicky has a special bed, a habitat, and its own plate at the dinner table. (And you thought the Addams Family was full of freaks.)  I ought to be crying. Spicky was the best pet we've ever had at Chez V. Ya gotta love something that doesn't shed, eat, make noise, excrete, require shots, a cage, or boarding. Who knew that damn pebble could break hearts?

A perfect GPA and I'm unemployed, drowning in housework and homework with mildew growing in the shower stall, dust coating every flat surface, spiders and cobwebs taking over the corners, and piles of laundry everywhere. I was voted Most Likely to Succeed, and I live with an elementary school dropout and a kid having a nervous breakdown over a geological formation. Where did I go wrong?

I want to outsource my life. 

I know there are bigger problems in the world. Tonight I'm too self-centered to care.

Thanks for listening.

September 14, 2006.

Comments

[Nance]

Nothing I can say will truly help. Just want you to know I'm out here, listening. And pulling for you. As impossible as it seems, try to do one thing at a time. Just one thing at a time.

[mamatulip]

You're welcome. Anytime.

Hang in.

[Granola-grrrl]

I hear ya loud and clear. Perhaps with those nice exposed brick walls, you could paint a big "X" on one, with the instructions "BANG HEAD HERE".

My washer did that for awhile too. I took my stuff to the laundromat for a month or so, until I decided it was such a pain in the neck that I'd rather chance it with the huge puddle of water (and I realized that I had spent more at the laundromat than a repair guy would cost). It has been fine since. -shrug- Good luck finding the file.

Hang in there! Breathe your way through, sort of like labor. Hopefully at the end, everyone will be reborn into the next [hopefully good] stage.

Hugs!

[deezee]

I think it's great that you let yourself rant like this, dosed and punctuated with irreverent humor. With only one kid in my corner, it's tamer in my territory, but that certainly doesn't stop me from completely questioning the jagged path of my life.

[V-Grrrl]

Morning has broken and things are looking up at Chez V. : )

E called last night and told me to unplug the water softener. It has a plug?!? Who knew?

Elementary School Dropout woke up and donated a favorite polished rock to Child #2. We have a new Spicky, and I have renewed faith in the good heart at the center of the Dropout's homework-hating persona.

I apologized to Child #2 for not being more compassionate over Spicky's disappearance last night, explaining I was tired and frustrated and the alarm beeping made me crazy. Apology accepted. Child #2 recognizes we were all having a breakdown of sorts.

I congratulated Dropout on progress made and apologized for melting down during the end of our four-hour homework marathon. Moment of epiphany: I hate homework too! We're on the same team!

Put on Superwoman sweats and vowed to tackle clutter and evil house sludge where it lurks. I will eliminate mildew with the Tilex laser.

I.Will.Locate.The.Missing.Washer.File.

I will put the tequila bottle in a glass case that says, "break in event of emergency" Everyone needs an escape hatch.

[Elisabeth]

Do not ever think that Spicky is weird. My daughter lugged with her, everywhere she went, for years, a paper mouse named Yvonne (Biosi, after the main female character in the movie "It could happen to you.") Yvonne was laminated a zillion times, and went to Disneyworld 3 times. She also had living quarters in a dresser drawer. Yvonne is still well and alive. I wrote one of my very first blog entries on Yvonne. We nearly lost her only once, when Claire forget her at a Warner Brothers store at the mall. We went back to the store, and they had found it and put it away!

We all have meltdown moments like what you experienced, when it seems that our life is falling apart and coming unglued. Glad to read that things improved a bit in the 24 hours after you had posted that entry.

[mamalujo1]

I wish I could help! About the washer: maybe the drain hose is loose?

[Arabella]

My husband and I once spent several weeks in an apartment in Italy in which the washing machine always dumped a ton of water on the floor. There are pictures of me all dressed up to go out to dinner, mop in hand, backside towards the camera, trying to clean it up.

Ugh. Sounds like you're going through a back-to-school adjustment phase. I am sorry.

[Mary]

I think there is a line in the Bible that goes something like this... "weeping endures for the night, but joy comes in the morning." If not joy, at least some new perspective! I'm glad things are lookin' up. (If I lived near you, I'd take in some laundry for you!)

[Ceece]

understandable, I think we're all entitled to our little self-centered bouts. I'm going through one right now.

Glad we could "help".

[Flubberwinkle]

Through it all I admired you for being able to put your thoughts on screen and still maintain your sense of humor. Pardon me V, I don't mean to be insensitive, but the "Elementary School Dropout" nickname and Spicky's dinner table status made me laugh aloud.

I'm glad the following morning is brighter. Hope the weekend is even better.

p.s. Is there any chance Spicky may be stuck in the washing machine's filter? Hope you find him/it (?) soon.

[Lisa]

Yep, that was pretty much my week, minus the rock. I'm relieved things are looking up for you now.

[Debbie]

Poor Spicky! I wonder if he is frightened? Poor you! What a terrible week. Oh well, things can only get better!

[Cissy]

I often tell my husband that I need a wife. I feel your pain.

[amber]

Oh, yeah! A wife would be great to have. LOL! Would it make you feel better if I sent you a picture of my messy house? Anything I can do to help. ;)

((you))
:)

[TB]

I hope Spicky was found and returned to his habitat among other things. Sometimes being a mom is just freaking hard, isn't it? I don't think I ever got that about my own mother. You're doing a great job.