My son loves me because...

...I think like a 12-year-old boy:

Son: What are those green things in the fruitcake?

Mom:  Candied boogers! Why do you think fruitcakes don’t appear until December? It’s because they have to wait for the fall cold and flu season to produce enough snot to use in the cakes!

***

After a long full day at a very crowded Christmas market in Germany, mother and son are part of an enormous mob of people waiting for a ride on a shuttle bus to the parking area outside the city. We can’t even see where we’re supposed to be going, we're hanging onto each other's jackets to keep from being separated as we’re being pushed along by the crowd:

Mom: I feel like a lemming. Any minute now, we’re going to discover we’re part of a group being pushed off a cliff.

Son: No, there’s a big hole in the street up ahead that swallows up all the pesky tourists…

Mom: Yeah, all the tourists fall in a hole and slide down a chute into a meat grinder. They turn them into sausages which are sold at the market!

Son: “Mmmm, isn’t this Bratwurst fresh! So much better than what you get in stores…”

Mom: “American sausage is the best. Tastes like pork!”

Son: “First we take their money and fatten them up on waffles, pretzels, candy, latkes, and frites…”

Mom: “And then we eat them…”

Son: “A new form of recycling!

Mom: “An efficient green initiative. Kinda like eating boogers…”

December 11, 2007

Comments

[furiousBall]

ahh, Belgian soylent green sausage

yummy candied boogers

[Anastasic Beaverhausen]

So glad I already had breakfast...

[Nance]

This is exactly the type of conversation my boys and I have.

I'm not saying it's a good thing. I'm just saying I don't have room to judge.

[V-Grrrl]

Ah, the joys of boys... : )

[mamatulip]

Candied boogers? Oh, I'm so going to use that one. *snort*

[Shirley]

Oh, yeah, this is the kind of silly conversations I have with my son. It's no fun being serious or normal all the time with conversations and believe me I am grateful for any conversation with my 19-year old. Also, often the willingness to engage in such absurd musings does lead to REAL conversations between the two of us. And, the candied boogers in the fruitcake ... I can only imagine my MIL's outrage at that ... she who thinks fruitcakes are gifts from God. LOL Very amusing.

[Peter]

I wish I could think like a 12-year-old boy and have so much fun along the way ;-)

It's always a pleasure to notice that 12-year-old boys can have an entertaining contact with their mother - I know plenty of 12 y olds in Antwerp who text their mother greedy "Get me a new playstation game now that you're shopping at Carrefour" messages.

Guess it all depends on values, education and, well, having a mom who has the right mindset.

[Amber]

Yep, it sounds like you two were made for one another. lol! Yuck.

:)

[Expat-CIT]

I'm taking notes on how to relate to 12 year olds! You're the kind of mother many little boys wished they had. :)

[Claudia]

Muahahahahaha. This conversations sounds eerily familiar. ;) Kids. Gotta love 'em.

[Tera]

I just loved your story...made me feel happy all over, feeling the fun relationship you have with your son. Lately, Kaeden is into jokes...but he does not understand jokes and it's hilarious hearing him giggle up a storm only to ask him what's so funny and him say, "I dunno." It's just one of those things about autism...and one of the reasons I bought him a joke book we read together every night before bed to try to help him on this funny journey of life.

[Manictastic]

Oh, you are just too funny, V.

[JMo]

MMMMM... soylent green anyone?

[RD]

I obviously don't have the same kind of relationship with my 12 yr old. When I told her that those were candied boogers on the cookie she was eating, she said, "Seriously, Mama?" I've got some work to do.